While Steve's away

So Steve has been gone for over a week now and we both sure miss him around here. We are getting a lot of calls on the house but are still waiting for a good, solid taker. Unfortunately, there are a lot of crazies in the world and it seems like they have all wanted to rent my house! :( We've dropped the price of the rent and done everything I know how to do, to get it rented. I'm having a lot of time at night to think to myself and wonder. I'm a planner so this not knowing what tomorrow holds is sure killing me. I'd like to say I haven't given up hope and I tell people that I haven't, but it's all starting to wear on me. I feel so helpless at this point. Just because it's hard to have hope doesn't mean that I'm not being positive, and having faith. I just have gotten my hopes up too many times these last few weeks, only to be crushed, but I WILL CARRY ON!
I do not feel sorry for myself or my family because we have no reason to. We are extremely blessed in so many ways, and Arizona represents a huge step in our lives and in Steve's career. There are a lot of people out there that are struggling a lot more than us and have a lot more to complain about than we do. I refuse to complain (sorry Steve, that doesn't mean you-- I just vent to you). I can say this last week has been hard, fun, enlightening, spiritual, and made me a tougher person already. I know you are thinking "Really Jillian, a week?!" Well you have to understand that I have NO idea when (or if) the house will rent, so that means I have no idea when we will be reunited with Steve. I have plans to go see him for Halloween, but honestly it is getting rough hearing Addi ask for her daddy and then tell me "I don' t want daddy to live is 'Zona' anymore." It is getting tough being the constant reenforcer, disciplinarian, care taker, and sole parent, but really I WOULD NOT change this experience for anything. I am learning so much and feel like I really needed this. It has been a wake up call to me. I, like most people, become complacent and maybe even take the things I have for granted. I love my Heavenly Father so much and I feel like we are being blessed in so many ways. I believe there are reasons why things happen/don't happen. At the end of the day when I have a minute to myself it has been easy for me to have little pity parties and cry and stress and wonder why my house won't rent- it's such a small thing to ask for- but then I stop for just a second and sit. I walk into my little girl's room and see that sweet little baby, the sweet little Spirit I've been given to have in my home, to raise as my own. I look around at our comfortable little home, I think of Steve's job, and of our families and friends. How can I feel sorry for myself??? I DON'T. I realize it is Satan trying to make me see all the bad that there is, but I won't let him. I can only see what we have and the opportunities we have. We have so much more than others and we have what we need. I refuse to feel sorry for myself and also to not look at the bright side of things. Our Heavenly Father knows our needs and wants and it is all in his time. :)